"How Her Restlessness Stirs, For She Longs For Her Liberty"

I have FINALLY finished reading Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte, and I say finally because I feel like I have been reading it for a year. I had no idea that the book was as long as it was when I started reading it on my ipod, until I saw the actual book at Borders and noticed it was over 600 pages. I really liked the book, I feel like it could have been about 10 chapters shorter, but overall it was good. I was really into it, but it started to drag about 3/4 of the way through and so I stopped reading it for a week, and I found myself forcing myself to finish the book. So I really do not have much to say since I am unsure as to whether I would recommend it or not. Here is the book description for those of you interested:

The loneliness and cruelty of Jane's childhood strengthens her natural independence and spirit, which prove invaluable when she takes a position as a governess at Thornfield Hall. But after she falls in love with her sardonic employer, her discovery of his terrible secret forces her to make a heart-wrenching choice.

And I just have to put this on here because it is my absolute favorite song from the musical version of this novel. Loves me some James Barbour singing.:)


Now I want a drastic change of pace, and I am going to start reading A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess. I am very excited to read this.

"Still Waiting, For This World To Stop Hating"

As a child, I always cried in movies where a character gets bullied or picked on. Dumbo, for instance, made me cry so much because of the way he was treated. Today is no different. I watched two movies this past weekend that made me cry so much because of the way the characters were treated for their differences. The Secret Life of Bees and The Boy In The Striped Pajamas.
I just can't understand how people can be persecuted for being different in any way. Whether it be race, religion, heritage, sexual orientation, weight, income, anything all the way down to clothing. What makes it okay for people to hate another person for being different? We are all humans beings, and it makes me incredibly sad to know that still, to this day, people are being treated differently.
No one should be discriminated against.
People today like to think that they would never let genocide happen again, but what about the horrible situation in Darfur?
So many people around the world are being abused in so many different ways, emotionally, physically, and it is depressing to know that some people will always hate someone for not being the same way they are.
I know that I am just one person, and I can't change the world, but every day I try to spread positivity, and show compassion to the people around me. Everyone needs a friend, or even a smile and a nice "hello" to a stranger can turn a person's day around.
Yes, I know it may sound lame, and it isn't saving anyone but honestly, we all just need to be kinder to each other and understand that there is not just one way to live. So please, go out and be nice to everyone you come in contact with, even if you are in a bad mood, no one wants to be with someone who is rude. Just remember to accept everyone and their differences. You don't have to agree with them, but you should be tolerant.

I really want to do more to help on a broader scope, I want to do more charity work and fundraising. So if you know of any good ones let me know. I have just signed up for the Los Angeles AIDS WALK. And I am very excited. Come walk with me. :)

"I Walked With You Once Upon A Dream"

I think I have discovered my problem. Movies and TV have shown me they type of man I have always wanted, yet I am not sure if they exist. I have three perfect examples of the man I find perfect for me.

Jim from The Office.

Charming, funny, adorable, caring, romantic.

Tom from 500 Days Of Summer.

Romantic, well dressed, sensitive, cute, artistic.

Will from Glee

Hardworking, loving, well dressed, musically inclined, intelligent, bilingual, teacher.

The thing I think all three of these characters have in common is that they are all charming, well dressed (loving sweaters and ties), romantic and funny individuals. I have yet to meet any guy that is all of these things. I have met a guy who is charming, but turns out to be completely fake. Occasionally I will meet a well dressed man, but then he is narcissistic. And a guy who is romantic in the most annoying and clingy way possible. Or a guy who is funny, but does know when to be serious. So I am guessing that it is going to be difficult to find a good looking/nice/funny/intelligent/talented/romantic/caring man all wrapped up in a sweater, outside of a script, so I should probably just stop being so picky.

"I Love Life, Life Loves Me"

This week has been lovely. I had so much fun on Saturday at Melissa's going away party. Maybe a little too much... This video came about while we were watching Les Miserables (after the party) and I saw Javert and said "Is that a Burberry coat?" From there we filmed the most random videos. Then Melissa pieced them together to make this ridiculous video.



On Tuesday night I went out with Zoey. We went to Panera Bread, where the man taking our order called her love, which was a little awkward for me (as was trying to find the table she was sitting at), but it was still really funny. Then we, get this, WALKED to Golden Spoon. Afterwards we drove around and sang in the car, then visited Kyle and Greg. We didn't know what to do because we looked like creepers hanging around outside apartments so we went to the park.
Life is crazy sometimes, because out of nowhere God can bring people back into your life that you never thought would be in it. At the park we found Ryan. I went to elementary school with him, and Zoey knew him from Jr High. After Greg and Kyle left, we stayed and talked to Ryan until about midnight. Never in my life did I think I would ever see him again.
On Wednesday night Zoey, Ryan and I watched So You Think You Can Dance and Glee. Both were amazing, Glee is such a wonderful show. It has been a fun couple of nights, it made me realize that I do have the energy to hang out after work. My social life isn't over like I thought it was! YES!

This morning I went to audition for a new commercial agent over at Abrams Artist. Honestly, I think I did really poorly. Definitely not my best read, but I am not too worried about it since I already have a commercial agent, I was just looking for a better one so I can get rid of my current one. But I have to call Abrams tomorrow to find out for sure if I got it or not. I will keep you posted on that, although I am not expecting the best.

I am looking forward to house sitting for my sister this weekend. It is always nice to be on your own for a little while.
Well that was just a little life update. Have a wonderful weekend.

"And Then It Hits You, You're Alone"

Yesterday, I realized something absolutely crazy. Every person in my immediate family met the person they are going to marry by the age of 19. Well, at least the females in the relationship were 19. My mom and dad were together when my mom was 19, my sister met her husband when she was 19, and my brother met Catie when she was 19(I am not sure what age my brother was, 19 or 20 I think). I can tell you now that will most not likely be the case for me. 19 is almost over. I only have about 6 months left (it may sound like a lot but it goes by quickly). Maybe I am too picky, and yes, it is ridiculously lame being the only person in my family to not have a significant other, even my mom and dad have someone (they are separated for those who don't know).

I couldn't even fathom having a boyfriend right now. At what point would I have time to spend with him? None really, although it would be nice to have one, and I would gladly make the time, but I don't think I even really like any guy enough right now to make that effort. I keep meeting guys that I could see myself liking, but I always stop myself from liking them by finding something I don't like about them. Plus, I don't really want my choices to affect someone else. If I were to have a boyfriend and I decide to spend the free time I do have with my friends, or if I just want to go home and sleep and not go out, I don't want him to be upset. Without a boyfriend I can do those things guilt free.
I just want something casual. I don't want a serious relationship where I have to constantly worry about the other person's feelings 24/7. I just want to go on dates and have fun. Where we can both have our separate lives but still have each other.

Maybe I can just find someone who lives a little further away, or someone who would only be able to be together Friday-Sunday. That way I won't feel guilty about being busy every day of the week from 8 to 6 and being too tired to go out after work.
I won't lie, I miss always having a guy there to go out and have fun with, but I just don't want anything that is going to be a lot of work.
I think it is amazing that so many people in my family find their love so early on. But I really think my love is going to come a little later, although who really knows, maybe in the next 6 months I will meet "the one" and in a few years we will get married. Just thinking about that makes me laugh.


Change of subject, I just bought the new Stephen Kellogg & The Sixers album "The Bear", and it is amazing. They never disappoint me. I can't wait to see them live in November.

"Find Your Grail"

Last night, my dad had an extra ticket to Monty Python's Spamalot, which is a musical comedy based on Monty Python and the Holy Grail. We had 8th row tickets, if you have been to the Ahmanson Theatre, you are so ridiculously close, I felt like I could just leap onto the stage...which at certain moments I would have loved to...
The show was something I had never wanted to or intended to see, it was a spur of the moment thing, and I am so happy I went.
The show was hysterically funny. I don't think I ever stopped laughing. It starred John O'Hurley as King Aurthur, he did really well, but one man stole the entire show.
That man is Christopher Sutton, he played Not Dead Fred, The Historian, and my personal favorite Prince Herbert. Everything about him was perfection. Another man who I think was amazing, was Matthew Greer, who was a great Lancelot (Who likes to dance-a-lot) but I thought he was especially funny as the Knight of Ni.
Everything about this show just took me by surprise. I am sad to know the show closes on Sunday because I really wanted to go and see it again. But don't fear! It is coming to Costa Mesa in October, you can bet I am going to go and see it again.